Once, long ago, in a land of monsters and corridors, a fair maiden was captured, and placed in a deep sleep. She was used to being captured, and she had a hero who rescued her on just such occasions. But this time the hero never came. And the fair maiden slept on.
Eventually, a King rescued the maiden, and made her his bride, which many wise old women might tell you is just another way of capturing fair maidens. And still the fair maiden slept on.
Then, the hero had another stab at rescuing the maiden from her prison, but he was too late. And, more importantly, he had forgotten the rules of fairy tales. He didn’t slay the dragon.
I have a mixed reaction to much of Colin Baker’s last TV serials, The Trial of a Time Lord season. There was much of it that was quite decent, including the introduction of Sabalom Glitz and the presence of BRIAN BLESSED, a man who seems to be built out of shouts. It was also fun to see Sil back again. However there are also problematical elements. The introduction of Mel before her actual introduction would have been genius, had we ever seen it happen. The less said about the Vervoids the better. And then there’s Peri. Ah, poor, dear Peri.
For those of you who haven’t watched the story, SPOILERS. Stop, go back, and watch it.
For the rest of you, you know that Peri dies in this story. Maybe. Possibly. But she actually survives. Maybe. Possibly. The Time Lords do some timey-wimey stuff, and we’re meant to believe she’s alive and well, having married a man she only just met and showed no real romantic interest in. Arguably this is better for her than being dead, but as a story, it kind of sucks. Then there are the continuity problems it brings.
Into this mess steps Big Finish. They’ve hinted before that something bigger was going on, and that Peri’s fate may be way more complicated. Now, thanks to writer Nev Fountain, we get to see their idea of what really happened.
The story has the Doctor arriving for Peri’s wedding to King Ycranos. She tolerates him for a few moments, and then has him thrown into prisons, during which time Ycranos is assassinated. The Doctor offers to help in the investigation, but this help is refused, and he remains in prison for several years, becoming friends with the aptly named Guard One and Guard Two. He also meets an aide to the new Queen who has a physical appearance I wouldn’t dream of spoiling for you. Eventually he’s released to help investigate the murder and from there things go a bit pear-shaped.
Fountain’s strength as a writer is comedy. He wrote “The Kingmaker”, which is a truly excellent Fifth/Peri/Erimem story that features a guest actor who sounds almost exactly like…well, go listen to it and find out. It’s a hilarious story all around. On the other hand, Fountain also wrote the Destiny of the Doctor story “Trouble in Paradise”, which I truly detested. This story isn’t quite up to “The Kingmaker”, but it’s light years ahead of “Trouble…” It’s amusing, and full of light comedic moments, but also has some bits of tragedy. There are also some great scenes with Peri which, given that Fountain is dating Nicola Bryant, comes as no surprise.
Where the story stumbles is on two fronts. First, the end seems a bit rushed and Peri seems a little too quick to jump back into the TARDIS. Second, and this isn’t the fault of anyone I suspect, but there is a rather large BRIAN BLESSED-sized hole in the story. One of the reasons I looked so forward to Big Finish revisiting this time in the Doctor’s life is that I really had hoped for Britain’s shoutiest man to return. But, alas, he isn’t here. I don’t know if they wanted to get him, but couldn’t, or if they just decided to have a story without him because it was thought it would be a good idea. But either way, his absence is keenly felt (and while we’re on the topic, come on, Big Finish! Give us some Glitz!).
Your enjoyment of this story will likely vary depending on your levels of tolerance for light comedy. I enjoy that, and I enjoyed this story quite a bit, despite the minor gripes I had with it. I’m looking forward to next month, when we get the return of the Daleks, but more importantly, I’m looking forward to December’s release, when a certain villainous Time Lady will return…
Written By: Nev Fountain
Directed By: Ken Bentley
Cast: Colin Baker (The Doctor), Nicola Bryant (Peri), Tim Chipping (Constable Wolsey/Mandrake), John Banks (Baron Pteratrark/Guard Two), Andrew Dickens (Reverand Flitamus/Guard One), FIona Sheehan (Princess Dirani), Glynn Sweet (Harcross The Ever-Patient/Pheen-Tu/Flunkey)
The Widow’s Assassin is available now from BigFinish.com and via the Amazon link below.
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